Thank you all for saying such nice things about our news, you are all very sweet and I think the world of you.
Joel is taking everything in his stride, meanwhile I am having intermittent freak-outs about the whole thing, but that may just be because I’m growing a human being in my body. I have known for at least 26 years that this is the way life works, but now that it is happening to me I find it kinda crazy. There is a person living inside me. Cripes.
You see we had the scan on Friday, and there on the screen in front of us was the unmistakable image of a little human-shaped thing. Surprise! Up until then I had been thinking of the baby in terms of various sized seeds and small fruit (because that’s what the books and websites seem to like comparing the baby’s development to – seeds and fruit). Seeing that baby shape on the screen, albeit a somewhat grainy black and white version of our baby, has forced me to realise that I am not growing a lime inside me, but a human. Things are starting to hit home.
As well as having mini freak-outs here and there, I’m also feeling really down about this whole morning sickness carry-on. I think these last few days have been particularly hard as I’m now past twelve weeks, and I’d built up in my head that when I hit twelve weeks it would subside. Anyone who has suffered from morning sickness knows that as you move into your second trimester morning sickness is supposed to die down, making way for renewed energy and lust for life. Of course every pregnancy varies and morning sickness tapers off at different stages for different people, but I guess when you’re in the mire of feeling like absolute rubbish you need some hope to hold onto – so that’s what I did, held onto the twelve-week-hope.
I have stuff on this week. Big stuff for work – including the NZ Music Awards on Thursday night. I naively assumed I’d be fine by this stage of my pregnancy, that I’d be all glowy and healthy, but hey guess what! Still sick! No idea how I’m going to cope this week! Pants.
Sorry for being all complainy – I know I’m actually very lucky to have a healthy wee mite, but I hope you can appreciate that I’m just sharing my experience on this journey as it really is, and I’m not going to lie and say I feel wonderful because right now I feel revolting. Besides, I have been feeling crap for six weeks now and haven’t had a chance to moan about it on here until now, so I guess I’m just making up for lost time.
It’s a weird thing because of course I’ve known about the phenomenon that is morning sickness, but until you actually experience it – trust me, you have no idea. I am in awe of every woman who has ever had a baby. Here are some interesting things I’ve learnt about morning sickness over the last six weeks:
- The fridge is a no-go zone. Everything edible pretty much smells like poop.
- If I do not eat something just before going to sleep, I will wake up in the night wanting to rip my stomach out (not the baby, just the stomach)
- If I do not eat something first thing in the morning before getting out of bed my stomach will host a revolt and protest my very existence.
- There is no answer to Joel’s question “what do you feel like for dinner?”
- I am constantly hungry but can barely stomach food. There is a fundamental flaw with this arrangement. Who invented morning sickness anyway?
- Ginger is a great remedy for morning sickness for many people… but not me.
- Anti-nausea acupressure bands, worn like skinny little sweat bands on the wrist, do very little except scream to everyone at your workplace “I AM PREGNANT” before you had any intention of them knowing.
- Fresh water tastes like stale water
- It doesn’t matter what time of day or night it is, whether I’ve just eaten or just brushed my teeth, my mouth tastes completely disgusting
- Speaking of brushing teeth – doing so too vigorously will secure your face an urgent appointment with toilet bowl
- And toothpaste tastes pants.
Look, honestly I could go on. Things aren’t pretty around our place at the moment. There is a bed in the lounge so I can live out my pitiful existence in front of the telly, there is a collection of dust on every surface like you wouldn’t believe, a huge backlog of other household chores that Joel is doing his level best to keep on top of, and the dog is being neglected (as is any semblance of a beauty routine). General colour of my face and lips? Grey.
Dear God, please take away this morning sickness so I can start enjoying this ride. Thank you. Amen.
PS: Please don’t tell me stories of how your/your sister’s/Sara Tetro’s morning sickness lasted the whole nine months, because those are not the sorts of stories that are going to cheer me up right now.