A tough start

comments 22

Why on earth would I wait until we’re three weeks into the year before bothering to update my blog? Well, the year has started with an enormous amount of sadness and pain, and while part of me really wants to just write and write and write about it, I have to respect the feelings of my family and assume they wouldn’t want me broadcasting our hurt online.


In the first week of this year we lost a much-adored family member. I don’t feel I should go into details, for the reason explained above, except to say that it was sudden and therefore no one was prepared to deal with the grief that followed.


And so I haven’t written anything here. I knew I couldn’t just pretend everything is fine (it’s not), but I also didn’t know how to put things into words. I still don’t think I know how to, and even now as I type I am aware I’m not doing a very good job, but I just wanted to let you know why I’ve been absent, and then I just want to carry on.


Thank you for being patient with me (you always are) and I promise I’ll be back soon. And I’ll even share a bump photo with you so you can see just how fat full of baby I’m getting.




  1. cantychick says

    So sorry to hear that 😦 My darling boy lost his Mum on Christmas Eve so I know all about sudden, unexpected and quite frankly shi&&y ways to end/start years.

    Take care xo

  2. I know how you feel Jane , My Aunty has just been taken off life support 😦
    Peace, Love & light
    I hope all is well with you , Joel & soon to be baby

  3. Certified says

    I am so sorry to hear of your loss and completely understand and respect your need to remain private on the matter. Know we genuinely care, but can do so from a distance.

  4. I’m so sorry to hear that the year has started so badly for u & your family. Losing someone is so difficult, I hope you all can lean on each other and overcome the sadness. No rush on another blog! Hope something good happens this week for you!

  5. dragonzflame says

    Sorry to hear – my year(s) ended and started horribly too, but not as badly as yours. And, what Certified said.

    We’ll see you back here when you’re ready.

  6. AndiNZ says

    Jane, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. My boy’s grandmother, who he adored, passed away in November, so I know how hard it is to start or end a year that way. Even though in our case, R’s grandma had reached a grand old age, and it had been coming for a good while, loss is still hard to take (and even worse when it is sudden).

    Take care of yourself and those you love. We’ll be here for you when you feel ready.

    • AndiNZ says

      Happy birthday for today, Jane. Hope there is only joy ahead for you for the rest of this year. 🙂

  7. Michael W. says

    Hi Jane: That is a really tough way to start the year – it stirs memories for us all I guess of people, family and friends alike whom we have loved and lost, sometimes suddenly. Which is worse, suddenly or protracted is a question I often hear being debated. My opinion is that each is tough and it really isn’t a relevant question.

    Strength, courage, blessing and love to you and your family. I wish you every success this year, especially with the coming baby. Be well, and I look forward to reading further columns from you when you are ready.

  8. Phoebe1 says

    Heartfelt love and condolences Jane to you and your family and Baby Bump.

  9. My Mum died just before Christmas. There are no words. One day at a time. Blessings to you as you journey through this.

    • jessicapea says

      hugs to you JenB, my Nana died last year and watching my mum go through loosing her (her mother) has been heartbreaking on top of m own sadness.

      • My grandmother died only a year before Mum. Mum was so strong and caring through the whole process, it was an inspiration to me as we nursed Mum in the last week. Not fair though.
        Thanks for your thoughts, Jessicapea and Phoebe1.

  10. Oh Jane, big huge virtual hugs to you and your family. Thinking of you all.

    Certified said it beautifully.

  11. Update : my Aunty passed away @ 2 am January 25th ( my birthday ) 😦
    I know how you feel Jane 😦

  12. katernz says

    Hugs to you and yours Jane, take care and come back to us when you are ready xx

  13. jessicapea says

    Sorry to hear things have been so ha Jane, completely understand your need to keep it private and also to take some time. Thinking of you and yours.

  14. karysta says

    Sorry that you have had a loss 😦 (sorry I’m not articulate either, but I really hate the phrase sorry to hear of your loss…it always sounds like I dont want to know in my head). we lost a dear member of our family 3 days before Christmas on our two year olds birthday. Sounds like theres been more than its fair share going around over the past couple of months. Take care

  15. Thank you all for your kind words, and also my sympathies to each of you who have also recently experienced loss…

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