Part of that simplification business I’ve been on about has had me reassessing my relationship with television (aka, my other boyfriend).
You guys have probably picked up on the fact that I am a big fan of TV. I do not discriminate. I love trashy reality shows, documentaries, soaps, DIY shows, cooking shows, game shows, talent shows… the works.
Sadly, since that pesky baby came along, I really haven’t had as much time to devote to my beloved television. It seems there just aren’t enough hours in the day to work, keep the house going, keep the small human alive and keep up with the Kardashians. I’ve tried all the various options but it turns out taking care of work, home and baby are non-negotiables, which only leaves telly.
In a rash moment of total insanity, I actually toyed with the idea of getting rid of the TV altogether. Then I considered moving it to the bedroom. Truth be told, the only real reason I considered these options is that we have really struggled to find a way to configure our living room furniture, and not having it all pointing towards a TV would give us a few much better options.
Unsurprisingly, we decided to keep the telly in the lounge because, seriously, who am I kidding? But I am still trying to cut down on my TV hours.
Up until recently my nightly ritual involved putting Victor down to bed, then flopping in front of the TV to watch Shortland Street. When that finished I’d end up just drifting into whatever else might be on. Some nights I’d actually pay attention to the shows that popped up on the screen, but most nights it was background noise and colour to my baking/internet noodling etc. In other words, there was a lot of TV consumption going on. Like, A LOT.
(Can I just take a moment to point out that I have surprised myself by consuming hardly any daytime TV when I’m at home with Vic? This has come as a surprise to me as I was looking forward to mainlining magazine and talk shows when I went on maternity leave, but it just never happened. Considering my fondness of the telly, I think this calls for a “well done me”).
So anyway, I figured the best way to reduce my time in front of the TV was to go cold turkey on the gateway drug that is Shorties. Yup, after countless years of spending every night with TK and friends it was time to reclaim 7.00pm-7.30pm for myself. And right away! Kinda like when a character makes the difficult decision to leave Ferndale, they suddenly fly out of the country that very same episode (Daniel Potts anyone?)
Like some cruel twisted joke, on my very first Ferndale Free day an alert popped up in my Facebook newsfeed to let me know this year’s feature length episode had been confirmed for 15th July. It was a test from the devil, of course. I was being tempted. I considered continuing to watch the show up until (and of course including) the feature length ep and then clocking off, but I was all fired up about quitting, so quit I did. And you guys, I managed to resist and went two full weeks without checking in to Shortland Street!
Tonight I rewarded myself by watching the feature length episode. But don’t worry, my resolve is strong. My visit to Ferndale was just a brief one and I was pleased to see that Ula has had a cuddle with her baby and Josh is not so evil after all. As curious as I am about an upcoming episode involving Jasmine being hit on by an old man, I won’t be stopping in at the I.V. for a drink anytime soon. I won’t be meeting anyone for coffee at Sugar. I won’t be partying on Q’Rd or driving past Marcel’s house. I won’t be updating my MyLife page or attending high-level meetings with the DHB. I won’t be throwing around terms like “tachycardia”, “febrile” and “pneumothorax” (well maybe pneumothorax, but only because I’ve had one before). And sadly, I won’t be cosying up in front of the fake fire at the Cooper’s or booking in any more fancy dinners at the Penlington.
Just like Vinnie dumped Nicole without warning because he still has unresolved feelings for Kylie, I’m dumping Shortland Street so I can free up my calendar to catch up on Sister Wives.
Life will never be the same again.