We’re terribly excited about these twins. Honestly we were going to stop at two, but clearly that decision was not in our hands and as it turns out we couldn’t be happier about that.
However… I do get overwhelmed at times. Not so much at the idea of dealing with two newborns and a toddler all at once – it’s a given that will be chaos, and I’ll do my best to get my head around that closer to the time – but right now I’m struggling a little with the growing-two-humans side of things.
My pregnancy with Victor was pretty standard stuff. A scare early on that turned out to be nothing, fourteen weeks of generally miserable morning sickness (but not bad enough to keep me from work), a fibroid here and there to keep an eye on… Overall, it was more or less textbook. I had plenty of energy in my second and third trimesters and spent those weeks knitting, daydreaming and planning life with our new little guy. They were pretty glorious months when I think about it.
Fast forward to now…
From the moment I found out I was pregnant this time around things were different. The exhaustion was instant and soon followed by intense morning sickness. The first wave of nausea hit on 23rd January while I was driving home from Look Sharp; since then I have barely left the house (let’s be real, I’ve barely left my bed) and it has been a real mindscrew. I nap at least once a day, I have to or I’ll fall over, and if someone is around to help with V then I’ll try to sneak in a second. For the last week I’ve been getting major headaches from about lunchtime, and they don’t ease until I’m fast asleep.
I have nearly passed out on several occasions and despite my belly growing at a rapid rate, I am three kilograms lighter than I was before I was pregnant because I’ve only been eating what I can stomach, which hasn’t been a whole lot.
Did I mention that, all up, Joel has been overseas for a third of the pregnancy so far? Cue violins. As you can imagine, this hasn’t been particularly helpful when it comes to keeping Victor occupied while I am curled up in bed feeling like pregnancy is the most unnatural thing ever. My toddler has been Lord-Of-The-Flies-ing it up big styles, I’m kind of amazed I haven’t shuffled into the lounge to be greeted by a pig’s head on a stick to be honest.
And let’s talk about the belly. That big ol’ belly. At (nearly) sixteen weeks I’m already about the same size I was around 23 weeks last time. Trying to get comfortable in bed is already a challenge, and I’m feeling like an old lady every time I get up from lying down or I go to bend over. But hey, no problem, only TWENTY WEEKS TO GO/GROW. That’s the bit that really blows my mind. If my body is already executing a rebellion at this early stage, what the heck is it going to be like in a few months time? I shudder.
You guys, I know I shouldn’t moan. I know I’m lucky to be able to have children at all, but I can’t lie to you – I’m not loving the twin pregnancy just yet, so please allow me this moment. I really hope the morning sickness buggers off for good so I can get a little energy and excitement back before my belly starts opening doors for me, has an excellent laugh at my back’s expense and I have to roll down the path to get the mail.
Actually, while I’ve got you, can anyone recommend a good belly support band? I think I may need one this time around. And a bottle of gin (or five), but apparently that’s no good for the babies. Go figure.
Before I go, I have to make mention of the fantastic support I’ve had from some family and friends. With Joel away I’ve had people coming to stay, cooking for us, looking after LV and checking in often to make sure we’re coping. I definitely would’ve come undone at the seams without those amazing people so here’s an online kissy kiss for them x
Hopefully next time you hear from me I’ll be all glowing (instead of this ghastly shade of grey) and super enthusiastic about the wondrous miracle happening within etc.